Why trying is worth rewarding…

Have you ever thought about what you’re asking a child with ADHD to do when you tell them they can only have privileges if they behave well?

You’re asking them to fight a biological reaction in their brain that’s so overwhelming it causes people to put their life in danger on a daily basis.

Kiddo was really struggling a while back. His behaviour was erratic and he appeared not to be listening to me. Discipline did nothing and so I knew this behaviour was being caused by something out of his control.

Punishment or taking away privileges will not help a child in this situation. If anything it will cause low self esteem and cause them to question why they even bother trying because it gets them nowhere anyway. We as parents, teachers and professionals have the power to change this with just one word. “Try”.

I dropped kiddo off to school and said, “if your teacher says you have tried really hard today I will take you to Mcdonalds”. I then told the teacher what signs to look for which show he is trying. This is an essential step, professionals need to know the signs they are looking out for.

At the end of the day he came to the car with a beaming smile as his teacher told me all the things he had tried really hard at. Sure he was hyperactive and disruptive even, but we focused on how much he was trying and you could visibly see the positivity in his eyes that the adults in his life were working with him and not against him.

Reward the effort and the trying because the behaviour itself can’t always be helped.

adhd

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